Skipping classes

Last week was a week of skipping classes.  I skipped Tuesday morning because once again, I was just super tired.  Sometimes the thought of working out and then not being able to nap that day just makes me tired.  :)  I also skipped my church class on Wednesday night.  Friday I skipped my workout again because of the snow.  Drake had me up at 3:45 and my alarm went off at 4:10.  They post by 4:15 if classes are cancelled because of the weather, so I laid back down for five minutes and the next thing I knew, it was 5:15.  Oops.  And I skipped Saturday because Chris was out of town all weekend and so I had Brady all to myself!!  No babysitter means no workout at Goals.

I have been super busy, but there isn't much to update on my Goals progress.  I'm really just embarrassed that I still can't control my eating enough to lost weight.  Last Monday, my weight was still at my midpoint weight - down 5.2 pounds total.  My body fat went down another .3.  If only I could tell that voice in my head to shut up every time I wanted to snack.  I have noticed that my muffin top is slowly going away.  I am toning up at least!  No matter how fantastic the workouts are, it's hard to be motivated when the scale isn't going down.  Completely my OWN fault.  Even though I am not a fan of my personal coach, I am the only one to blame.  I would probably still snack even if she was responsive.  I did work out with her last Thursday during kickboxing and it was my hardest workout yet.  I practically crawled to my water bottle for a drink and could feel it in my lungs that whole day. 

My sister Melissa and I talk a lot about this process for me.  I told her I appreciate her letting me take over our conversations about this since this process is taking over my life right now.  We both share an interest in health and fitness, and she always knows just want to say to me to get me motivated again.  I told her I wished she lived here and we could have done this together.  I was telling her Friday night that I think in my head, I have given up on the challenge aspect of this.  Clearly I don't know what challenge means since I am not doing as great as I wanted to on the nutrition part.  She made me realize that there is still two weeks left and I will want to look back on this knowing I didn't give up towards the end because of fear of failing (typical Heidi-style).  So, this week I am not skipping workouts no matter what!  And I will track my food and not give up in my head.  I know I'm a slow work in progress.  I feel lucky that after this I will continue with a membership there so I don't have to give up these great workouts and I will be surrounded with workout friends who can still give me pointers on nutrition.  I'll get there, at a turtles pace....

And for the best part, pictures of my Brady:

 

Playing in the snow on Friday

With my Mom & Dad

What a week!!!

Car problems - AGAIN!!!  And I had to get it fixed asap or my engine would blow up.  So, I've always had an attachment to my car and have driven it for 11 years this month!  But, after putting into it over half of what it's worth over the past six months, I'm beginning to think it's time for a new (used) car.  I'm going to start looking I think.  :(

Workout was INTENSE this morning!  One of the instructor's husband is beginning to teach and today was his first day.  Yikes.  I burned 100 more calories during kickboxing today than I normally do.  I feel like I've faltered this week - more little snacks and fatty snacks.  And I've come to realize I not only have one excuse, but multiple excuses for everything.  I skipped Wednesday morning because I was exhausted.  And to give you an example of my excuses, it went like this: I was tired Tuesday morning already (more than normal), one of the little girls is teething, so she had a rough day on Tuesday, I get up with Drake in the middle of the night and do not sleep great anyways, I have been getting up early and going to bed later than I should be for a month now, blah blah blah.  I was even up to let Drake out Wednesday morning, but I went back to bed.  I wish, really wish, I was one of those self-motivating people who just "does it", no matter what.  What is interesting about this week is I'm still down almost a pound and I've realized that by supper time, I really am not hungry.  I'm fueling my body with the correct foods and amounts during the day that eating just a lean protein meat with veggies is satisfying most of the time.  Interesting...  I guess they are right.  :)  I feel grateful that I have found a program that works.  I'm still deathly afraid of getting on the scale, and when it does go down, I almost don't acknowledge it at first for fear that it will go back up.  I need to stay positive though since I weigh less then I did before I got pregnant.  Yay.  Finally. 

I have updated goals for the next three weeks at Goals.  I want to increase my water intake by another 16-32 ounces.  I want to consistently lose two pounds a week, not just one to two.  I need to pre-plan every single meal.  Lastly, I want to drink pop on Mondays, Fridays, Saturdays and Sundays only.  I've doing pretty good on all of them except for the pop.  Shocker. 

I thought it would be fun to show pictures of Brady when he was a baby in February, when he was 1 years old in February and now that he is 2.  It really shows how fast he is growing!  I need to get his 2 year pictures done asap!

2 months old

 

One year and two months old

 

Two years old!!!  Before haircut!

After haircut!!  And eating.. again..

MidPoint Testing

We had midpoint testing on Saturday at Goals in Motion.  Four weeks down, five to go!!!

My weight was down 5.2 pounds.  My body fat was down 1.5.  Thanks to cross training the night before and sore muscles because of it, I did two less pushups (full) than I did at initial testing, but my situps (full) went up by over 15.  It is so nice to see progress again!!  Now, I just need to remember to stay away from those carbs after 3/4 pm since that has made a difference this past week.  I did try something new again last week - steel cut oats (with protein powder).  Again, it's something that I think I just need to get used too.  And it was so nice to finally have a team meeting.  I felt like I was the only one struggling and that I was failing, but it was nice to hear that others are having struggles too.  What a big life change we are all trying to make. 

And here are some more pictures of Brady.  He figured out how to climb up on the counters last week...

Hmmm..  Can I do it??

Yes, I got this side open!!

But wait, my snacks are over here....

Now, I just need to get up there so I can reach them!!!

Ok mom, now that I can reach the apples, I'll try one...

Or three....

I was Jillian Michael'd last night...

There are some things I really can't wait for:

1. To wear my wedding ring again.  It's been over 2 years.
2. To put my jeans on and not having to squeeze into them.
3. To actually buy some of those cute workout clothes.

But yesterday I fessed up to my coach how frustrated I was with my weight loss.  I always just think 'it's just the way my body is'.  My coach has not been very communicative, but when I received her email last night, I felt like I was in the Biggest Loser gym and had Jillian Michaels in my face.  I literally had to own up to all my excuses and realize that everything she was saying was completely true.  Whether or not I was embarrassed, they were true.  Yes I'm pushing myself, but I could push myself more.  Yes I'm making better choices, but not like I need too.  My body needs to reset itself with apparently a week of 100% clean eating.  I broke down, completely, and felt like my eyes were opened.  Thankfully Chris sat there and listened to me cry for awhile so I could just get it all out. 

Today, I'm going to take one meal/section of the day at a time instead of thinking of the whole day.  I need to get to the grocery store, but really don't want to be on the roads this morning, so I'm trying to make it work.  A big hurdle will be getting over the idea that food comforts me.  Especially after long days or on weekends.  I guess I thought I was all in, but apparently I wasn't.  :)  Here goes.....

Week 3 Update

So, I had myself a little pity party almost all week.  I weighed myself this morning and I ended the week up 1 pound.  So, I'm still down three and I have to remind myself that at least I'm losing, but I allowed it to be a black cloud over my head this week.  I do appreciate all the encouragement I'm getting - it really does mean a lot to me!!

I still love the workouts.  Love Love Love.  I missed Friday's workout because of the billion excuses I came up with (including Brady being sick), but as the morning went on, I realized I mentally should have just got up and gone.  Lesson learned.  I kicked the bag's butt today!!

I tried another new recipe this week:  homemade turkey balls (a recipe from my coach).  Not really sure what I thought of them, but they are supposed to be a good protein source so I'll learn to like them.  I've also been adding my whey strawberry flavored protein powder to my yogurt.  Makes a big (and yummy) difference!!

There is nothing better than cuddling with your doggy when you aren't feeling well (except for cuddling with mommy)